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jamesjmessina.com

Helping You Become All You are Capable of Becoming

SEA's Lifestyle Tools: The Emotional-Behavioral Connection in Recovery
SEA's Emotional and Behavioral Connection in Recovery
Section 3: SEA's Tools for a Recovery Lifestyle 
As presented in:
Self-Esteem Seekers Anonymous - The SEA's Program of Recovery

By James J. Messina, Ph.D.


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What is the connection between behaviors and your emotional state?

Compulsive behavior is often linked to your emotional state or your response to a specific situation, event, or belief.

You are most likely to act a compulsive way when your emotional life is in turmoil or out of balance.

Binging or compulsive patterns of acting are often directly attributable to how you are feeling or reacting to yourself, to a situation, or to a belief.

Certain kinds of activities become more attractive to you at times of emotional stress or turmoil.

The rate at which you consume a meal, a drink, or smoke a cigarette is in direct relationship to the emotional tone surrounding the place in which your behavior is occurring.

Compulsive behavior patterns are often a result of the emotional state in which you find yourself, e.g., (1) closet eating, drinking, or smoking can result from guilt feelings about the behavior, (2) eating or drinking in a car or while on the run can result from feeling overstressed and under pressure, (3) skipping meals can result from fear of gaining weight or a lack of proper time management, (4) snacking, drinking, or smoking can result from feeling bored or just looking for something to do.

Which common emotional cues will lead you to unhealthy compulsive behaviors?

DIRECTIONS: Circle the emotions which are most likely to lead to your compulsive behaviors. 

 
Emotion Feeling Cluster
Boredom listless, unoccupied, restless, uneasy, a need for novelty, change, or excitement
Anger rage, hate, cheated, infuriated, spiteful, mean, mad, or envious
Guilt ashamed, miserable, remorse, blamed, distraught, or pain
Tired exhausted, overworked, drained, not enough sleep, run ragged, drowsy, numb, listless
Depression

left out, ugly, empty, powerless, victimized, suffering, useless, low, sad, helpless, discouraged, or troubled

Anxious overstressed, out of control, nervous, overwhelmed, uneasy, tense, pressured, panicked, troubled, confused, or shocked
Lonely unwanted, unappreciated, left out, ignored, unloved, alone, hurt, neglected, ugly, or rejected
Fearful afraid, tense, anxious, nervous, weak, worried, skeptical, frightened, threatened, or panicked
Excited eager, driven, energetic, capable, turned on, enthusiastic, motivated, or clever
Comfortable proud, refreshed, appreciated, satisfied, accomplished, useful, respected, content, confident, full, calm, or relaxed
Happy good, nice, glad, loved, pleased, wonderful, delighted, or beautiful

What healthy activities you can substitute when the emotional cues come

Any of the following healthy activities could be substituted for the unhealthy compulsive behaviors. Remember, to have a recovered lifestyle, enjoy everything in moderation.

Be watchful for emotions which lead to unhealthy behaviors.

Do deep breathing exercises.

Take a walk.

Get involved in an exercise program.

Read a book.

Block out desire to act compulsively by thought stopping.

Pay more attention to the people and activities with whom you are currently involved.

Remember the goal to attain a recovered lifestyle.

Use a stress-reduction technique to reduce tension.

Ignore the desire to eat, drink, smoke, abuse drugs, gamble, shop, etc.

Work out emotions which lead to unhealthy behaviors.

Use emotional release activities to rid yourself of unhealthy emotions.

Make a telephone call to a relative, friend, or a SEA's Buddy.

Avoid the settings that arouse negative emotions.

Talk out feelings with a relative, friend, or SEA's Buddy.

Use rational thinking to problem solve an irrational belief that would lead to unhealthy, compulsive behavior.

Alter the way food or drinks are used in social and celebration events.

Establish a fixed pattern of times and places for meals, exercise, rest, leisure and reading.

Establish times and places for eating, drinking, or interacting with others that are not emotionally provocative.

Use the TEA System to keep an eye if your actions and thoughts are consistently healthy and in sync with healthy emotional responses.

Use the ALERT System to deal with stressful, anxiety-provoking and panic emotions.

Use the ANGER System to ventilate and release negative emotions.

Use the LET GO System to free yourself of the compulsive need to control people, places, and things which are the uncontrollables and unchangeables in your life.

Use the CHILD System to deal with feelings of boredom, loneliness, isolation, and abandonment.

Use the RELAPSE System to get you back on track if you succumb to emotions which lead you to unhealthy behaviors.

NOTE:   For more information on this section, look at the Tools for Personal Growth and Tools for Anger Work-Out on this site.


©1999-2010 James J. Messina, Ph.D. & Constance Messina, Ph.D.  For more information contact Jim at jamesjmessina@gmail.com Note: Original materials on this site may be reproduced for your personal, educational or noncommercial use as long as you credit the authors and website. All internet resources on this site are encouraged to be reproduced on sites with similar interests and audiences.