Introduction to Tracking:
Pathfinders track the structures, procedures, rules and policies in their homes which are intended to define limits within which their children have the opportunity to develop into personally responsible people with healthy self-esteem. These structures are clearly defined and adhered to in consistent ways. There are some structures which are non-negotiable and others which can be open to discussion and change within the context of family organizational meetings. The structures are developed in the following areas: self-care, environmental issues, household chores, use of TV, VCR, stereo and computer games, family telephone, family time management, family finances, family recreational and leisure needs, academic needs of children, relationships outside the family, family relationships and family meetings. The structures account for the differing developmental needs of the children and family. They are adjusted as children grow older. Pathfinders utilize the natural and logical consequences model for monitoring and regulating the structures. The goal in establishing structures is to eliminate "over-parenting" and "over-disciplining" children. The more thought out the structures, the better able are they to be understood and followed by children. What follows are some Pathfinder issues in developing guidelines for home structuring.
Overview of What is Tracked:
Pathfinder's Home Structuring Policy Manual Exercise
Directions: In a separate notebook from your journal, record currently existing procedures, policies, guidelines, rules and structures which exist if applicable in your family life for each of the following Pathfinder Home Structuring Policy Manual topics. Once you have recorded what you remember, check it over with your children in family meetings until you have a complete up to date listing. When you complete this exercise you will have created your own family's policy manual.
Journal Exercise
Directions: In your personal journal respond to the following questions:
1. How do you feel about being so structured with your children? What are your concerns about this structuring? How consistent do you think you can be with such structuring?
2. What additional structuring topics have you discovered as you proceeded in developing your family's policy manual?
3. How comfortable were you in recording these structural guidelines? Do you prefer to have everything informal and spontaneous? What are the benefits or pitfalls of this policy manual concept?
4. In reviewing the topics for family structuring, can you recall the structures used in your family of origin? How did they differ? How were they similar?
5. What were your children's response to this exercise? How did you feel with their reactions? How did you respond to their reactions?
6. How do you feel about the family meetings? How comfortable are you in implementing them in your family? What are the obstacles to having successful family meetings in your family?
7. What has been your children's reactions to family meetings? How have you responded to their reactions? How hopeful are you about how well your children have taken to these meetings?
8. What transitions do you foresee for your family when more intensive family meetings will be required? What do you think the topics will be at such meetings? What resources can you turn to inorder to assist you and your family deal with these transitions?
9. How open have you been with your children in developing your family policy manual? Which of the topics suggested in this section did you skip because you feel too shy or embarrassed to discuss with your children?
10. How did you feel about some of the suggested guidelines offered in this section? What was your response as to if they were too tough or not tough enough? Were they reasonable or not reasonable? How did your own personal structures listed in you policy manual differ from the suggested ones in this material? What progress do you feel you are making in implementing the Pathfinder Parenting System in your family?